Find a Marriage and Family Therapist

A Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) is a counselor who helps couples and families. They have special training to work with relationship problems. Unlike other therapists who help with many different issues, a marriage therapist focuses only on relationships and family problems. Family counseling is their main specialty.

These therapists understand how families work together. They know that when one person in a family has problems, it affects everyone else. They help families learn better ways to talk to each other and solve problems together.

Becoming a marriage and family therapist takes a lot of education and practice. Here's what they need to do:

• Going to School: All marriage and family therapists must finish college and then get a master's degree. This takes about 6-7 years of school total. During their master's program, they learn about families, relationships, and how to help people.
• Getting Experience: After school, they need to work with real families for thousands of hours while an experienced therapist watches and helps them. Most states require 3,000 to 4,000 hours of this practice time. This is like having a very long internship.
• Taking Tests: Before they can work on their own, they must pass hard tests that show they know how to help families safely and correctly.
• Keeping Up with Learning: Even after they become licensed, they must keep learning new things every year. They take classes to stay up-to-date on the best ways to help families.

Each state has its own rules for marriage and family therapists. Here are some things that can be different:

• Training Requirements: Some states need extra training. For example, New York requires therapists to learn about child abuse. Other states might require learning about domestic violence or drug problems.
• License Renewal: Some states make therapists renew their license every year. Others do it every two or three years. The cost and requirements are different in each state.
• What They Can Do: In some states, marriage and family therapists can only work with couples and families. In other states, they can also help individuals.
• Working Across State Lines: If you want to work with a therapist from another state, make sure they can legally help you. Some states let therapists from other states work there, but others don't.

Understanding what happens in therapy can help you feel more comfortable about going.

• First Visit: Your first few visits will be about getting to know each other. The therapist will ask about your family, your problems, and what you want to change. This helps them understand your situation and make a plan to help you.
• Different Ways to Help: Therapists use different methods to help families. Some focus on feelings and emotions. Others help families learn new ways to talk to each other. Some look at how the family is organized and help make changes.
• Who Comes to Sessions: Sometimes the whole family comes together. Other times, just the parents or just the couple might come. The therapist decides what works best for your family.
• How Long It Takes: Every family is different. Some families feel better after just a few visits. Others need to come for several months. Most families see improvement within 12 to 20 visits.

1. When Talking Doesn't Work: If your family members can't talk without fighting, or if you feel like no one listens to you, a marriage therapist can teach you better ways to communicate. Family counseling helps families learn to work together instead of against each other.

2. During Big Changes: Big life changes can stress families. This includes:

   • Getting married or divorced
   • Combining families
   • Having a baby
   • Moving to a new place
   • Job changes

   Family counseling can help you handle these changes better.

3. When You Keep Having the Same Fights: If you have the same arguments over and over without solving anything, or if fights are getting worse, a therapist can help you find better ways to solve problems.

4. When Someone Has Mental Health Problems If someone in your family has depression, anxiety, addiction, or other mental health issues, family therapy can help everyone learn how to support each other while staying healthy.

1. Therapy is Private: What you talk about in therapy stays private. Therapists can only share information in very specific situations, like if someone is in danger.
2. It's Normal to Feel Nervous: Most people feel nervous about starting therapy. This is completely normal. Good therapists understand this and will help you feel comfortable.
3. You Can Change Therapists: If you don't feel comfortable with your therapist after a few visits, it's okay to find someone else. The most important thing is finding someone who feels right for your family.
4. Therapy Isn't Just for Crisis: You don't have to wait until things are really bad to get help. Many families go to therapy to make good relationships even better.