Find Therapy for Self Harm

Medically reviewed by Gabriela Asturias, MD on May 23, 2025
Written by the MiResource team

Self-harm is a painful and often misunderstood coping mechanism. For those who struggle with it, the physical act may offer temporary relief — but it never addresses the real source of pain. If you or someone you love is self-harming, know this: you are not alone, and support is available. With the right therapy for self harm, healing is not only possible — it’s likely.

  • Carla Weismantel, Psychiatric Nurse Practitioner

    Carla Weismantel

    Psychiatric Nurse Practitioner

    9000 West Chester Street, Milwaukee, Wisconsin 53214

    Carla Weismantel is a Psychiatric Nurse Practitioner in Milwaukee, Wisconsin. They treat Self Harm, Borderline Personality, Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD).

    The best of mental healthcare in one place. At Geode, we combine full-spectrum psychiatry and talk therapy to better meet changing patient needs.

    View profile
  • Alyssa Austern, Psychologist

    Alyssa Austern

    Psychologist

    Remote only

    Alyssa Austern is a Psychologist in Chatham, New Jersey. They treat Self Harm, Oppositional Defiant Disorder, Narcissistic Personality.

    Hello! I'm Dr. Alyssa Austern and I am a clinical psychologist who specializes in couples and family therapy, as well as individual therapy across the lif

    View profile
  • Ada Wang, Psychiatric Nurse Practitioner

    Ada Wang

    Psychiatric Nurse Practitioner

    486 W Boughton Rd, Bolingbrook, Illinois 60440

    Ada Wang is a Psychiatric Nurse Practitioner in Bolingbrook, Illinois. They treat Self Harm, Drug Use, Suicidal Ideation.

    The best of mental healthcare in one place. At Geode, we combine full-spectrum psychiatry and talk therapy to better meet changing patient needs.

    View profile
  • Michelle Litwer, Psychologist

    Michelle Litwer

    Psychologist

    Remote only

    Michelle Litwer is a Psychologist in undefined, undefined and has been in practice for 8 years. They treat Self Harm, Relationship(s) with Friends/Roommates, Alcohol Use.

    My main objective is to help clients manage their emotions, make decisions that are line with their values, and to live fulfilling and meaningful lives.

    View profile
  • Stephen Barlow, Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC)

    Stephen Barlow

    Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC)

    5540 Falmouth Street, Richmond, Virginia 23230

    Stephen Barlow is a Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC) in Richmond, Virginia. They treat Self Harm, Polyamorous relationship, Relationship(s) with Partner/Husband/Wife.

    I help people overcome anxiety, depression, and stress stemming from relationships or past experiences, in individual or couples counseling.

    View profile
  • Katy Jones, Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC)

    Katy Jones

    Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC)

    54 Park Place, Grand Chute, Wisconsin 54914

    Katy Jones is a Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC) in Grand Chute, Wisconsin and has been in practice for 22 years. They treat Self Harm, Postpartum Depression, Alcohol Use.

    Katy specializes in divorce mediation, depression, anxiety and stress management, assertiveness training, and various relational issues.

    View profile

What is self-harm, and why do people do it?

Self-harm refers to the deliberate act of hurting oneself, usually as a way to cope with overwhelming emotions, inner turmoil, or a sense of numbness. It can take many forms: cutting, burning, hitting, scratching, or even interfering with wound healing. While it may seem shocking from the outside, for the person doing it, self-harm is often a desperate attempt to find relief, control, or emotional release.

People self-harm for a variety of reasons:

  • To express or manage intense emotions like anger, sadness, shame, or anxiety
  • To feel something when feeling emotionally numb
  • As a form of self-punishment or guilt
  • To release tension or pressure
  • As a cry for help — though not always consciously

It’s critical to understand that self-harm is not attention-seeking or manipulative behavior. It’s usually secretive and often tied to deep internal struggles. That’s why counseling for self harm is focused not only on stopping the behavior but on uncovering and healing its emotional roots.


Is self-harm the same as a suicide attempt?

No — while self-harm and suicide attempts may sometimes overlap, they are not the same. Most people who self-harm are not trying to end their life. Rather, they are trying to cope with emotional pain, not escape life altogether.

However, self-harming behavior can increase the risk of suicidal thoughts or attempts over time, especially if the underlying issues are not addressed. That’s why it’s so important to take self-harm seriously — even if the person insists they’re “fine” or not suicidal.

Therapy for self harm provides tools to manage distress in safer, more sustainable ways and helps reduce the risk of escalation.


What are common signs that someone may be self-harming?

Self-harm is often hidden due to shame or fear of judgment. Still, there are signs that may suggest someone is struggling:

  • Unexplained cuts, bruises, burns, or scars
  • Wearing long sleeves or pants even in warm weather
  • Frequent “accidents” or vague explanations for injuries
  • Avoiding situations that require revealing skin (e.g., swimming, changing clothes)
  • Emotional withdrawal, irritability, or mood swings
  • Sharp objects kept in private places (e.g., razors, lighters, broken glass)

If you notice these signs, it doesn’t automatically mean someone is self-harming — but it’s a signal to check in gently and nonjudgmentally.


Can someone self-harm even if they seem fine or high-functioning?

Yes. Self-harm doesn’t discriminate. People who self-harm can be high achievers, professionals, caregivers, or outwardly happy individuals. Many become experts at masking their emotional pain.

This is why self harm therapists focus not just on visible distress, but also on subtle emotional struggles like perfectionism, self-criticism, anxiety, or unresolved trauma. Just because someone is functioning on the outside doesn’t mean they aren’t hurting inside.

It’s important to create safe spaces — through therapy or trusted relationships — where people can drop the mask and explore what’s really going on.


What emotions or mental health conditions are linked to self-harming behavior?

Self-harm rarely occurs in isolation. It’s typically a response to intense emotional pain or underlying psychological conditions that make it difficult to manage distress in a healthy way. For many individuals, self-injury becomes a form of emotional regulation — a way to release, distract from, or “feel” something during times of numbness, anxiety, or inner chaos.

Common Emotional Triggers

People who self-harm often experience overwhelming feelings such as:

  • Shame or self-hatred: A person may feel they are fundamentally “bad,” broken, or undeserving of kindness — and use self-harm as a form of punishment.
  • Guilt: Self-harm may be seen as a way to “atone” for perceived mistakes or wrongdoings.
  • Anger: Particularly when it can’t be safely expressed outwardly, anger may be turned inward.
  • Loneliness or isolation: The pain of feeling unseen or unloved can become so intense that physical pain feels more tolerable.
  • Numbness: Some individuals self-harm to “feel something,” especially when emotionally disconnected or dissociating.
  • Fear of abandonment: In some cases, self-injury is a desperate attempt to express distress or maintain a connection when someone feels emotionally at risk of being left.

These emotions are not signs of weakness or drama — they’re signs of deep inner struggle. That’s why therapy for self harm focuses not just on stopping the behavior, but on understanding and soothing these underlying emotional wounds.

Mental Health Conditions Commonly Linked to Self-Harm

Self-harm is not a mental illness in itself, but it often co-occurs with one or more mental health conditions. Addressing these conditions is a key part of effective treatment.

  1. Depression

Self-harm is common among people with depression. Feelings of hopelessness, worthlessness, and emotional numbness may drive someone to seek sensation or relief through self-injury. It may feel like a way to “wake up” when everything else feels flat or meaningless.

  1. Anxiety Disorders

Individuals with generalized anxiety, panic disorder, or social anxiety may use self-harm as a way to escape intense worry or to gain a sense of control. When anxiety becomes unbearable, physical pain may temporarily redirect focus or calm the nervous system.

  1. Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)

BPD is one of the conditions most closely associated with self-harm. People with BPD often experience intense, rapidly shifting emotions, unstable relationships, and chronic feelings of emptiness. Self-injury can serve as a coping mechanism during moments of extreme distress, abandonment fears, or emotional overload. Dialectical behavior therapy for self harm is particularly effective for individuals with BPD.

  1. Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)

For trauma survivors, self-harm may be a response to flashbacks, intrusive thoughts, or emotional dysregulation. It can also reflect feelings of guilt or self-blame stemming from the trauma. Therapists may integrate trauma-informed approaches to address these deeper wounds.

  1. Eating Disorders

Self-harm often coexists with disorders like anorexia and bulimia. Both behaviors may be rooted in perfectionism, control, or self-punishment, and both may function as ways to manage emotional pain or dissociation.

  1. Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) and Related Conditions

Some individuals may experience self-harming urges as part of compulsive behavior or obsessive thoughts. This is less common but can be addressed through cognitive behavioral therapy for self harm that includes exposure and response prevention (ERP).

  1. Substance Use Disorders

Self-injury and substance abuse sometimes occur together, particularly when a person is using both to numb pain or escape overwhelming emotions. Therapy may address the interconnected patterns of coping and self-soothing.

The Importance of a Holistic Approach

Because self-harming behavior is so often tied to other emotional and psychological challenges, effective treatment requires a comprehensive view of the person’s mental health. A self harm therapist will assess co-occurring issues and tailor treatment accordingly — using an integrated approach that may include talk therapy, skills training, trauma work, family support, or medication when appropriate.

Whether you're seeking online therapy for self harm or in-person support, the goal is to help the individual build emotional awareness, learn safer coping strategies, and create a life where self-harm no longer feels necessary.

Dialectical behavior therapy for self harm and cognitive behavioral therapy for self harm are effective in helping clients identify, understand, and tolerate these emotions without turning to physical harm.


What types of therapy help with self-harm (e.g., DBT, CBT)?

Several evidence-based therapies have proven effective in treating self-harming behaviors:

Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT)

Originally developed for individuals with BPD, DBT teaches clients skills in four key areas:

  • Emotion regulation
  • Distress tolerance
  • Interpersonal effectiveness
  • Mindfulness

Dialectical behavior therapy for self harm helps people understand their triggers and develop new coping strategies that don’t involve hurting themselves.

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)

CBT helps individuals recognize and challenge unhelpful thoughts and beliefs that fuel self-harming urges. It also teaches healthier ways to respond to emotional triggers.

CBT for self harm often includes:

  • Thought tracking
  • Identifying core beliefs (e.g., “I don’t deserve love”)
  • Replacing harmful behavior with safe alternatives

Trauma-Focused Therapy

If the self-harm stems from past abuse, neglect, or trauma, approaches like EMDR or somatic therapy may be appropriate.

Psychodynamic or Insight-Oriented Therapy

These therapies explore the deeper emotional roots of self-harm, such as attachment wounds or identity struggles.

Whether in person or through online therapy for self harm, the most important factor is a strong therapeutic relationship rooted in safety and trust.


Can medication help reduce self-harming urges?

In some cases, medication may help — especially when self-harm is linked to a co-occurring condition like depression, anxiety, or mood instability.

Medications that may be considered include:

  • Antidepressants (SSRIs or SNRIs)
  • Mood stabilizers
  • Anti-anxiety medications
  • Atypical antipsychotics (in specific cases)

Medication is not a cure for self-harm but can reduce emotional intensity and increase a person’s ability to engage meaningfully in therapy. A psychiatrist or prescribing doctor can assess whether it’s appropriate on a case-by-case basis.


How do therapists approach treatment for self-harm?

A self harm therapist doesn’t just focus on stopping the behavior — they focus on understanding the person behind it.

Treatment often begins with:

  • Building trust and creating a nonjudgmental space
  • Assessing safety and developing a plan for managing urges
  • Exploring the function of self-harm (What does it do for you? When does it happen?)
  • Introducing coping tools such as grounding techniques, journaling, art, or movement
  • Uncovering and healing underlying emotional wounds

Many therapists also work closely with families, schools, or care teams if appropriate — always prioritizing the client’s emotional safety and dignity.

Find care for you

Recovery is possible. With early intervention, a supportive community, and the right professional care, you can overcome challenges and build a fulfilling life. We’re here to help you find the support you need.

Share:
Find Therapy for Self Harm | Self Harm Therapy Services | MiResource